Oh alright haha. :) Thank you.
Overall, incredibly disappointing day. It could more on my personal stand point but I am disappointed. I can remember every little detail about my performance, the reason why we lost was because it was boring and sloppy, the people that should know what to do properly can’t even be respectable or follow others, and I couldn’t even spend my mother’s birthday with her. I really hope only one person saw me crying because he was sitting in front me the second time it happened. I can’t wait for Saturday of next week because it will finally be over.
I don’t want to give up because I hate the fact that things are simply repeating themselves and always will be. I still want to believe there’s some hope but I always see you with her. I’m sick of myself, knowing that I probably will never appear “perfect” to you or anyone else. I just give up now and just admit that I am wasting my time on you. There isn’t a point anymore in trying.
Going to bed now…
9 days left. I’ve had my fill of it. I am ready for it to end because there is just so much I would rather not see. I have my breaking point and hopefully I can get over you. Sometimes I really feel like that even if I do something new, things just repeat themselves. I hate knowing that the past couple of years have been entirely redundant. Ugh I’m just gonna shut up because hardly anyone listens or cares. Some things just never change. Hopefully sleep will provide some comfort for this restless mind…..
Short post on today: Basically nostalgia from being in my elementary school for the first time in 4 years. That was ridiculous. I can’t remember too much of anything else besides what I just found out an hour or two ago.
My FAVORITE band (Marianas Trench) of ALL TIME will be in MY STATE IN A FREAKING WEEK. A WEEK GUYS!!!! Oh my God, I need to go to this since it’s a free live acoustic set in a mall with an autograph session!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH someone kill me!! It’s 2 to 3 hours away and it’s the same day as the freaking SAT’s!!! I need to go, I think I might not be able to talk to anyone for a month if I can’t go to this. Free. Acoustic. LIVE. I can’t sleep now.
If I only had the guts to actually say it.
I came so close to breaking down today. I have be strong for the next two weeks. I don’t want people to see me cry, especially the band. It just gets… so hard sometimes. I really hope the past six months weren’t a waste of my time because it’s beginning to feel like it. Just two more weeks. I’m sorry but for a while now, it hasn’t felt like my sanctuary at all.
I wonder if they know just how much it hurts…
Hi there Jiselle :)
Hm… I’m not really sure. I’d love to just travel the world and just take breathtaking photos of everything I see, experiencing different cultures, drawing at my free whim and enjoying music in every way possible. Either that or become well versed in ancient history and know all of the Greek mythology. That would be really cool. But truthfully, I really don’t know what I can see myself doing as a full time career.
(P.S. I still love your background and I think your name is amazing <3)
Why, thank you :)
I like your picture by the way haha